Don’t Fret My Pet – Valentine’s Day is for Rovers

valentine-puppy

Don’t Fret My Pet – Valentine’s Day is for Roversvalentine-puppy

Valentine’s Day is just days away and we all know what that means…Hallmark makes like a gazillion bucks! Okay, well maybe not that exact amount, but they are more or less cashing in and calling it love and romance.

As a female I have never really cared for Valentine’s Day, which of course, no one believes.  They tell me I’m just being single and bitter, which, for the record, I am not single and bitter; I didn’t care for V-day when I was in a relationship. It’s probably because I have spent the last 9 years working in a floral shop on Valentine’s Day and in the floral industry V-Day means one thing, $$! So shut up everyone!

One thing I do enjoy about this time of year is the reactions and opinions I hear from individuals towards Valentine’s Day.  Some enjoy the sentiment and tradition of Valentine’s Day, some only get annoyed by the holiday if they are single but relish it when in a relationship, and some completely despise the day. But everyone seems to agree that the holiday is purely a commercial holiday with the goal of selling over priced products.

According to a poll done by Offers.com, one quarter of men who spend on V-day either feel “obligated” or “trying to get lucky”. Sounds about right, but was it really necessary to take a poll on the exact stereotype of the holiday? I also heard that the longer a couple has been in a relationship the less money they spend on V-day. My guess is those couples have already given up trying to get lucky, therefore don’t have to spend money.

The fact I found the most surprising that I read on the internet, so obviously it’s true, and  ran through my Brian Williams fact checker app is that Americans are estimated to spend roughly $700 million dollars on their pets this Valentine’s Day! I had no idea that my dog Bernie was expecting me to wine and dine him?! Where am I supposed to make a reservation for V-Day dinner on a Saturday that is dog friendly on such a short notice? The reason I even got a dog was for the expectation of being loved without having to put forth any effort what so ever, as long as I kept the dog alive. Well, one thing is for sure is that my dog Bernie is going to be greatly disappointed if his expectations aren’t as low as they can be, because I am definitely going to buy him a Valentine’s Day outfit to wear.  That’s right, I’ll dress him as a little Cupid or something obnoxious, and we’ll see who wants to celebrate Valentine’s Day next year.

Take that Bernie.

 

Kayla Avery

Kayla Avery

Kayla Avery is a stand up comedian, writer and boxed wine enthusiast who you should follow on twitter @averykayla

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