Night School: Sexual Education for The Modern Man

We're bringing Sexy back.  Read our 4 part series: Night School - Sexual Education for the Modern Man.

Night School

Sexual Education for the Modern Man

Attraction is the subject of our first installment.

Sex.  Very few of us know how to get it and even fewer of us know what to do with it when we do.  Today’s sexual landscape has driven even the best of us into an all too personal relationship with our computers. Meeting woman and having sex has been under attack for some time and most of us are now in thriving relationships with Pornhub and ESPN.  But consider this, if they had their way, you would never leave your apt; these are not healthy relationships.   We think it’s time to log off and start paying attention to the real world.  Trust me, there is a much bigger reward that is just waiting for you to get up and take it by the hand. But how you ask?

Fear not – WDB is here to shed some light on the mysteries of Sex and meeting woman.  We’ve enlisted Boston’s own, Mistress of the Night and Founder of L’Ecole Nuit Luxury Lingerie, Kristine Isberg.   In this four part series, we will teach you to see and navigate the hidden walls in front of you and do the things that will help you attract more women, while refining your skills to keep them coming back.

Gentlemen, welcome to Night School and now a word from our Dean:

Founder of E'cole Nuit - Kristine Isberg Photo by Erik Patton

Founder of L’Ecole Nuit – Kristine Isberg
Photo by Erik Patton

I founded L’Ecole Nuit not only to indulge in my passion for luxury lingerie, but also to educate women – and men – on the art of seduction. I felt that our sexual lives were becoming devoid of any real intimacy and fulfillment. So I made it my mission to teach my clients how to live more passionately by encouraging them to explore their sexual desires and not be afraid of their sensuality. That’s why I am excited to be a part of this series – and it’s always fun telling men what to do in bed… So let’s begin Night School.

Part 1: Attraction

What women want is simple – how to give it to them is not so simple. As a woman who spends her day dressing (or undressing) women in lingerie, it’ s my business to know what a woman wants and how to make her feel sexy and desirable. The first step to navigating the opposite sex is to start with the fundamental objective – how to make yourself attractive to the opposite sex. We are all guilty at some point of seeing a couple together and asking ourselves – why is she with him? Attraction is more than physical, it is about making a woman feel special. We forget in today’s digital world that at the basic level, we are sensual beings. When something makes you feel good, you want more. That’s the essence of attraction, you are attracted to the feeling.
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So now you ask, how do I make a woman feel special and desirable? First, you need to get her attention and keep it just long enough to make her take notice and want more. As they say, it’s all in the eyes. Good eye contact is essential to not only getting her attention, but also keeping her interested. When you are talking with a woman face-to-face, not texting or skyping, look directly into her eyes. It may sound simple, but most people don’t look you in the eye when they talk to you. They either look around them, down at the ground – or the absolute worst – check their phone. Sorry fellas, but its no longer cool to have your phone always buzzing. It is much cooler to ignore the calls and give your undivided attention to the woman in front of you. It shows her that she is the most important thing to you at that moment, and that makes her feel special. When she is speaking, occasionally look at her lips moving and then back up into her eyes. The subtle glance at her mouth is definitely a turn-on. Lastly, it’s okay and actually encouraged to send your gaze lingering over her body, just long enough to show you appreciate her looks, but also not too long as to be creepy. Consider it a lingering glance and this should be done at a point when you are getting ready to close the initial contact. She will appreciate the attention, and you will get the last look!
Lovely Couple At Mirror Reflection.Second thing to making a woman feel special at the initial attraction level is touch. I’m obviously not referring to feeling her up right on the spot. This part has to be done with utmost subtlety. Let’s start with proximity. As most Bostonians, we are not typically touchy, feely by nature. However, when engaging in conversation with a woman, you should be close enough to her that your physical presence affects her – in a good way. Lean in towards her when she speaks. Also your body stance says a lot. Be casually confident, don’t stand with your two feet apart and hands in pocket. That says, I am emotionally unavailable, as well as insecure. Your posture should be relaxed and appear very natural, even if it requires practice. As with eye contact, a lingering touch is very sensual and creates that initial physical connection. If she is getting up from a seat, stand up and perhaps support her gently by putting your hand under her arm. Or if standing next to each other, lean in towards her, gently touch her arm for a few seconds and whisper your goodbye in her ear. It may sound cliché, but these little gestures are powerful tools in the game of attraction. It is about getting her attention, making her feel your presence, and leaving her with wanting more.

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Sam Calef

Sam Calef

Sam Calef is Founder and Managing Partner at Well Done Boston. He always has time for interesting people, the whole truth and a trip to the beach.

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